I don't mind. I mean... it would be cool to spend the night together sometime, if you want.
[ Jason feels like he's kinda digging himself into a hole here, despite how wrapped around each other they are right now. But it's not as if Barry isn't telling him it's okay if stays over, right?
But then there's his schedule too. And yeah... Bruce. ]
I can take a few days off when B goes to do Justice League things... which... oh. Right. That includes you. So you wouldn't be available then either.
[ Right. Perfect. How do people do this shit?
The literal worst feeling in the world is when Barry finally pulls out and rolls off of him, but Jason rolls right with him, not wanting to part much as he lays on his side, half on top of Barry anyway, feeling the other man's cum start to leak out between his legs. He reaches up and follows the same bath as Barry's fingers, carding his own fingers through his hair.]
Didn't really like the fighting part, thought. I mean... was that even a fight, or was that just me being an asshole?
[ Yeah. He and Bruce are... on the... same team there. So. Not really that great a plan? At least when it comes to heading off because Bruce is doing Justice League things. The downside of being on a team with Batman when you're sleeping with his ward.
When Jason turns into him, however, Barry welcomes him with a soft little hum, arm draping around the other's shoulder as he holds him close and lays there, looking up to the ceiling in thought. ]
Maybe a bit of both. Though you were kind of an asshole, yeah.
[ Looking to him, he wears a playful little grin on his lips before he huffs a quiet laugh and bumps his head against Jason's. Clearly to show that he's gently teasing him there. ]
I'd like it if you could come out to my place sometime. But I know that's not always possible as it is for me to just run here quickly to see you.
[ Perks of being a speedster.
Plucking Jason's hand from his chest, however, he laces those fingers with his own and holds the other's hand, pressing his lips to the back of Jason's hand, though not really brushing a kiss there. Not yet at least. ]
[ Jason is kind of annoyed that the whole Bruce thing is a Big Deal. It shouldn't have to be- they're both consenting adults and this is what they want to do. He wants to give Bruce a big middle finger when it comes to his personal life, but he knows Barry isn't going to be like that. He knows it matters to him.
Jason wonders how much that's going to get in the way... or maybe they really can just be super stealth about this, and meet up here and there without him knowing. It's not like it's weird if Barry shows up to the manor, or to events in Gotham, right?
It's nice when Barry puts his arm around him, but even so, Jason feels a little guilty- maybe better than a lot guilty like he felt before. Whether Barry is teasing or not, Jason knows he fucked up there. ]
I'll try not to be.
[ He can try, at least. Jason kisses Barry's lips lightly when he bumps their heads together, fingers still carding through his hair. But it's when Barry takes his hand and laces their fingers that Jason feels that renewed warmth blossom across his chest, and he smiles softly, trying to push all the doom and gloom out of his head. ]
I'll come to your place first chance I get, alright? Bruce can deal for a day or two. He's got other people. Hell, he'd probably prefer 'em over me.
[ Gently, he lets those lips brush a soft kiss over the back of Jason's hand before he comes to bring their joined hands up to his cheek and he nuzzles them, brown eyes flicking their gaze over to Jason. ]
He'll probably find out eventually.
[ He lets his thoughts be known to Jason, falling quiet after a moment, still nuzzling at the back of that hand he holds there against his cheek. ]
I think I'm just โ I don't want to disappoint him? You're family to him. You know him and he knows you in a way I don't know either of you and that's ok. Really. I just...
[ Sighing, he tilts his head this way and that in contemplation, licking over his lips as he brings their joined hands around to press his lips in thought there against the back of Jason's hand again. Needing that connection. To be grounded in this moment with how rapid fire his thoughts can be. ]
It's different when it's family and not just a teammate. I don't think he'd care so much if I was seeing someone from the League. But you're... family. In a way we aren't to him. That has to mean something.
[ Jason can't help but say defiantly, because really... so what? What does this even have to do with Bruce? He likes Barry and Barry seems to like him too, and if Bruce has a problem with that, then... whatever. Jason doesn't want to care.
What's he gonna do, kick Barry off the Justice League? Take away his Robin status? That would be a whole lot of bullshit.
Jason lets out a soft huff, but that doesn't stop him from brushing their laced fingers along Barry's cheek when he brings them there, trying to use that as an anchor to keep his own rapid fire thoughts at bay as well. Maybe it's different from what Barry experiences, but in real time, Jason's are still there, harder and harder to ignore. ]
So... you think being with me is gonna disappoint him?
[ Jason swallows hard, looking away. He almost pulls his hand away, but he doesn't really want to. ]
I'm not family to him. Not in the way that you think. I'm just... someone he's taken in to replace someone else. I mean... deep down I know that. Everyone knows that. I'm grateful he took me in, and I fucking love being Robin, but I love this a lot too and I don't think it's fair to like... base the whole damn thing on Bruce.
[ He's grateful that Jason doesn't think to pull away entirely and fingers seem to squeeze a little tighter then as he looks to him, eyes soft and searching. ]
No โ I don't.
[ Despite how quick he can be with anything and everything, his words are slow โ are soft and earnest. ]
I feel like he'll be disappointed in me because I should know better and... maybe I should. But โ I don't know. You make me feel things I've never felt before and I like being with you. I like talking to you and doing things with you and I like your motorcycle and the way you don't really care if I get really excited over super boring stuff.
[ Worrying his bottom lip, he sighs, pulling Jason's hand to brush a kiss over the back of it. ]
You're cool and I worry I'm not good enough for you.
[ Jason can already feel the overload of insecurities trying to dump on his thoughts, and he wonders how he even got this far with someone like Barry. Someone so good and so sweet, so caring and undamaged.
He doesn't look at Barry even as the other man squeezes his hand a little tighter, but it helps keep him here, even if here feels like it's starting to spiral away from him. ]
Know better than what? What are you supposed to know better about? Not being with me??
[ Jason's jaw clenches, but then as Barry goes on, his eyes slide back to him, searching his face, and then he looks down at their hands against Barry's lips. ]
You're worried you're not good enough for me? Are you kidding me? All I can fucking think about is how I'm not good enough for you. How I'm just gonna... constantly fuck this up, even though you make me feel things I've never felt before either.
[ The fact that they share an equal amount of insecurity about this is... somehow it tracks? Given how they both are. Even with the League, Barry felt insecure with his place on it. He wasn't super strong, wasn't a fighter, didn't have any cool gadgets or piloting skills. He was just... fast. He had, however, eventually come to find his place and his importance on the team and maybe that's what he need to do here. With Jason. With this. ]
I mean โ you've seen Superman, right? Aquaman? Even Wonder Woman. I am like โ not first pick of the hottest and coolest on the team, ok? I will just... flat out admit that right here and now.
[ He sounds like he's joking but really, he's not. ]
I... like you. A lot. Way more than I probably should. I just... want you. Like this. Like the park. Like getting food.
So what you're trying to tell me is you think Bruce won't think you're good enough for me because you're not... Superman or Wonder Woman. Man, you're like... seriously overestimating how he thinks about me cause that's like... total bullshit.
[ Jason does pull his hand away this time, and scrubs it over his face before pushing himself up on his arm to look down at Barry. He doesn't get it. He doesn't get how Barry feels like he's the one not good enough, when that's all Jason has been. Barry is incredible, and he's just... bullshit.
But Barry's words stop him dead in his tracks, and that frustrating self hatred of his trickles away into a confused, but relieved look.]
I like you too. I want you too. I wanna be with you. Like... fuck everyone else kinda be with you. And I really thought you didn't wanna be with me cause of the whole date thing... but that's what I want. And I can be better... and you don't have to worry about disappointing anyone cause it's never gonna be you who disappoints, Barry. You're amazing.
[ Barry would disagree so strongly in Jason thinking that he's bullshit. He may be a little rough around the edges at times and his words are sometimes liable to cut with how sharp they can be, but... Barry's done pretty well for himself in knowing how to handle it. Somewhat.
Still, when Jason seems to more or less feel the same way โ I like you too, I want you too, I wanna be with you โ Barry finds himself coming to lean up on his elbows and he just... stares to the other for a long quiet moment, before he finally lets a smile tug at the corners of his lips. ]
Then... let's see what happens?
[ Words that are soft, genuine, and earnest in every way they possibly can be. ]
If... you want to, that is. Perks of being so fast is that I can be here whenever you need me to. No long travel times there. [ Wearing a gentle smile on his lips, he swallows, feeling his heart hammer in his chest. ] I'm willing to see if you are.
[ Barry's done really well for himself, considering Jason's emotional distress tolerance is like that of a damn child, and he doesn't know how to fix any of that, or even work on it. Maybe none of this will be fair to Barry in the end... or maybe Jason will surprise even himself.
Even now he feels like he's on the verge of an emotional breakdown, but Barry looks at him in such a way that helps push it all back, and Jason takes a deep breath, looking down for a moment as he nods. Okay. Okay, he can work with this. ]
I want to.
[ His hand slides across the sheets to find Barry's again, looking at him. ]
I wanna see what happens, and I don't give a shit what anyone else thinks.
[ The smile on his lips could light up a room with how bright and warm it is, laughter softly spilling from his lips as he cranes his neck to drop his head against his shoulder, fingers taking Jason's within their own when he reaches for them. ]
Ok then. Seeing what happens is a go then.
[ And, try as he might, he can't resist and leans himself over to steal a warm kiss from those lips, fingers squeezing Jason's a little tighter as he does so. A gentle touch of reassurance for something he doesn't know the outcome of, but. He wants to see. He wants this right here. He wants Jason, in any way he can get him. ]
[ That smile really does light up the room, and Jason can't help but smile in return, because how could anyone not? It's enough to get him to think that maybe this will turn out differently than everything has in the past.
Jason nuzzles into Barry's hair, more than happy to lace their fingers back together again.
They deserve to have a chance, don't they? All Jason ever wants is to have a chance at things. ]
That's what I like to hear.
[ he says against Barry's lips before kissing him some more, slow and deep as if they have all the time in the world, at least when it comes to kisses. When the kiss breaks, Jason groans a bit and pushes Barry back a bit to lay half on top of him. ]
Wish we could just spend the night together. Don't really wanna be without you right now.
[ He lets Jason fall into him and drapes an arm around his shoulder again, laying there amidst the tangle of sheets with the smell of sex still tightly gripping him. He's quiet for a moment before he brushes the pad of his thumb against Jason's shoulder, letting his thoughts drift a bit as he turns his face into him. ]
I know. [ Even as he says that, he drops a kiss to Jason's head. Slow and soft. ] But we'll figure something out. We'll find time. Just a lot of trial and error at first I guess. Finding what works and what doesn't.
[ Considering they both have their own cities to look after but, again, it helps that Barry is as fast as he is. Even if it means he'll be the one doing most of the going back and forth. It's fine. He can juggle it. Just like he does crimefighting, work, and some semblance of a life. What's adding a romantic relationship of sorts to the mix, right? He's got this. ]
[ Maybe it's a lot to manage, and that's why this sort of romantic thing has a terribly low success rate among crime fighting vigilantes, but Jason doesn't care. Maybe others couldn't handle it, but Jason knows he can, and the fastest man alive can handle it too, right? ]
Yeah, trial and error... I'm cool with that. And maybe sometimes we can just come here after we get out crime fighting on. Just to like, crash or whatever.
[ That would be nice, and he'd do it without making Bruce suspicious, because he knows Barry is worried about that. He does feel bad that Barry is going to have to do a lot of the traveling, though. He doesn't want that to start getting annoying. ]
I mean โ you could? Just might take you awhile to.
[ When distance is regarded as a factor in things, Barry really is the better choice for being the one to do the traveling. Not to say that he'll always be able to drop everything and come running as he does have a life and responsibilities of his own, but. He can find the time to. Always.
Coming to gently play with Jason's fingers, he brings that hand up to his mouth and drops a kiss there. Soft. Sweet. Matching the smile he wears on his lips. ]
Yeah, a real long fucking while. Maybe I can just steal one of B's jets.
[ he laughs softly, cause he's totally just kidding about that (or is he??). he'll have to check up on how quickly he can get to central city though, so barry isn't the only one going back and forth all the time.
the kiss to his hand gets him to slow it down though, as do barry's words. he really is worrying too much about this, isn't it. he lets out soft huff, smile on his lips as he nods. ]
Yeah. Okay, you're right. Shit, I've never had anyone tell me to chill out before.
[ very, very false, but jason's dead sure of it anyway. ]
[ He knows the distance between them could possibly render this a "long distance relationship" to some, even though... it's not SUPER far from each other? Just a quick plane ride away... or Barry zipping across cities away. Either way, they'll make it work.
That other part, however, has him raise a brow as he cocks his head to the side because... ]
Are you sure about that?
[ He is absolutely calling bullshit on that, Jason, sorry. But at least it's done in both a teasing and playful way? If the smile he wears isn't any indication of that, that is. ]
[ It's pretty far, considering Jason can't just ride over there, but it's not as tragic because of Barry's speed. Hell, they wouldn't have ever met up that night to hang out if it wasn't for that.
Jason rolls his eyes with a laugh, falling back against the bed. What a jerk. ]
Shut up, fine. I get it all the time. But I'm not that wound up, I swear.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ Jason feels like he's kinda digging himself into a hole here, despite how wrapped around each other they are right now. But it's not as if Barry isn't telling him it's okay if stays over, right?
But then there's his schedule too. And yeah... Bruce. ]
I can take a few days off when B goes to do Justice League things... which... oh. Right. That includes you. So you wouldn't be available then either.
[ Right. Perfect. How do people do this shit?
The literal worst feeling in the world is when Barry finally pulls out and rolls off of him, but Jason rolls right with him, not wanting to part much as he lays on his side, half on top of Barry anyway, feeling the other man's cum start to leak out between his legs. He reaches up and follows the same bath as Barry's fingers, carding his own fingers through his hair.]
Didn't really like the fighting part, thought. I mean... was that even a fight, or was that just me being an asshole?
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When Jason turns into him, however, Barry welcomes him with a soft little hum, arm draping around the other's shoulder as he holds him close and lays there, looking up to the ceiling in thought. ]
Maybe a bit of both. Though you were kind of an asshole, yeah.
[ Looking to him, he wears a playful little grin on his lips before he huffs a quiet laugh and bumps his head against Jason's. Clearly to show that he's gently teasing him there. ]
I'd like it if you could come out to my place sometime. But I know that's not always possible as it is for me to just run here quickly to see you.
[ Perks of being a speedster.
Plucking Jason's hand from his chest, however, he laces those fingers with his own and holds the other's hand, pressing his lips to the back of Jason's hand, though not really brushing a kiss there. Not yet at least. ]
We'll figure something out.
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Jason wonders how much that's going to get in the way... or maybe they really can just be super stealth about this, and meet up here and there without him knowing. It's not like it's weird if Barry shows up to the manor, or to events in Gotham, right?
It's nice when Barry puts his arm around him, but even so, Jason feels a little guilty- maybe better than a lot guilty like he felt before. Whether Barry is teasing or not, Jason knows he fucked up there. ]
I'll try not to be.
[ He can try, at least. Jason kisses Barry's lips lightly when he bumps their heads together, fingers still carding through his hair. But it's when Barry takes his hand and laces their fingers that Jason feels that renewed warmth blossom across his chest, and he smiles softly, trying to push all the doom and gloom out of his head. ]
I'll come to your place first chance I get, alright? Bruce can deal for a day or two. He's got other people. Hell, he'd probably prefer 'em over me.
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He'll probably find out eventually.
[ He lets his thoughts be known to Jason, falling quiet after a moment, still nuzzling at the back of that hand he holds there against his cheek. ]
I think I'm just โ I don't want to disappoint him? You're family to him. You know him and he knows you in a way I don't know either of you and that's ok. Really. I just...
[ Sighing, he tilts his head this way and that in contemplation, licking over his lips as he brings their joined hands around to press his lips in thought there against the back of Jason's hand again. Needing that connection. To be grounded in this moment with how rapid fire his thoughts can be. ]
It's different when it's family and not just a teammate. I don't think he'd care so much if I was seeing someone from the League. But you're... family. In a way we aren't to him. That has to mean something.
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[ Jason can't help but say defiantly, because really... so what? What does this even have to do with Bruce? He likes Barry and Barry seems to like him too, and if Bruce has a problem with that, then... whatever. Jason doesn't want to care.
What's he gonna do, kick Barry off the Justice League? Take away his Robin status? That would be a whole lot of bullshit.
Jason lets out a soft huff, but that doesn't stop him from brushing their laced fingers along Barry's cheek when he brings them there, trying to use that as an anchor to keep his own rapid fire thoughts at bay as well. Maybe it's different from what Barry experiences, but in real time, Jason's are still there, harder and harder to ignore. ]
So... you think being with me is gonna disappoint him?
[ Jason swallows hard, looking away. He almost pulls his hand away, but he doesn't really want to. ]
I'm not family to him. Not in the way that you think. I'm just... someone he's taken in to replace someone else. I mean... deep down I know that. Everyone knows that. I'm grateful he took me in, and I fucking love being Robin, but I love this a lot too and I don't think it's fair to like... base the whole damn thing on Bruce.
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No โ I don't.
[ Despite how quick he can be with anything and everything, his words are slow โ are soft and earnest. ]
I feel like he'll be disappointed in me because I should know better and... maybe I should. But โ I don't know. You make me feel things I've never felt before and I like being with you. I like talking to you and doing things with you and I like your motorcycle and the way you don't really care if I get really excited over super boring stuff.
[ Worrying his bottom lip, he sighs, pulling Jason's hand to brush a kiss over the back of it. ]
You're cool and I worry I'm not good enough for you.
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He doesn't look at Barry even as the other man squeezes his hand a little tighter, but it helps keep him here, even if here feels like it's starting to spiral away from him. ]
Know better than what? What are you supposed to know better about? Not being with me??
[ Jason's jaw clenches, but then as Barry goes on, his eyes slide back to him, searching his face, and then he looks down at their hands against Barry's lips. ]
You're worried you're not good enough for me? Are you kidding me? All I can fucking think about is how I'm not good enough for you. How I'm just gonna... constantly fuck this up, even though you make me feel things I've never felt before either.
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I mean โ you've seen Superman, right? Aquaman? Even Wonder Woman. I am like โ not first pick of the hottest and coolest on the team, ok? I will just... flat out admit that right here and now.
[ He sounds like he's joking but really, he's not. ]
I... like you. A lot. Way more than I probably should. I just... want you. Like this. Like the park. Like getting food.
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[ Jason does pull his hand away this time, and scrubs it over his face before pushing himself up on his arm to look down at Barry. He doesn't get it. He doesn't get how Barry feels like he's the one not good enough, when that's all Jason has been. Barry is incredible, and he's just... bullshit.
But Barry's words stop him dead in his tracks, and that frustrating self hatred of his trickles away into a confused, but relieved look.]
I like you too. I want you too. I wanna be with you. Like... fuck everyone else kinda be with you. And I really thought you didn't wanna be with me cause of the whole date thing... but that's what I want. And I can be better... and you don't have to worry about disappointing anyone cause it's never gonna be you who disappoints, Barry. You're amazing.
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Still, when Jason seems to more or less feel the same way โ I like you too, I want you too, I wanna be with you โ Barry finds himself coming to lean up on his elbows and he just... stares to the other for a long quiet moment, before he finally lets a smile tug at the corners of his lips. ]
Then... let's see what happens?
[ Words that are soft, genuine, and earnest in every way they possibly can be. ]
If... you want to, that is. Perks of being so fast is that I can be here whenever you need me to. No long travel times there. [ Wearing a gentle smile on his lips, he swallows, feeling his heart hammer in his chest. ] I'm willing to see if you are.
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Even now he feels like he's on the verge of an emotional breakdown, but Barry looks at him in such a way that helps push it all back, and Jason takes a deep breath, looking down for a moment as he nods. Okay. Okay, he can work with this. ]
I want to.
[ His hand slides across the sheets to find Barry's again, looking at him. ]
I wanna see what happens, and I don't give a shit what anyone else thinks.
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Ok then. Seeing what happens is a go then.
[ And, try as he might, he can't resist and leans himself over to steal a warm kiss from those lips, fingers squeezing Jason's a little tighter as he does so. A gentle touch of reassurance for something he doesn't know the outcome of, but. He wants to see. He wants this right here. He wants Jason, in any way he can get him. ]
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Jason nuzzles into Barry's hair, more than happy to lace their fingers back together again.
They deserve to have a chance, don't they? All Jason ever wants is to have a chance at things. ]
That's what I like to hear.
[ he says against Barry's lips before kissing him some more, slow and deep as if they have all the time in the world, at least when it comes to kisses. When the kiss breaks, Jason groans a bit and pushes Barry back a bit to lay half on top of him. ]
Wish we could just spend the night together. Don't really wanna be without you right now.
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I know. [ Even as he says that, he drops a kiss to Jason's head. Slow and soft. ] But we'll figure something out. We'll find time. Just a lot of trial and error at first I guess. Finding what works and what doesn't.
[ Considering they both have their own cities to look after but, again, it helps that Barry is as fast as he is. Even if it means he'll be the one doing most of the going back and forth. It's fine. He can juggle it. Just like he does crimefighting, work, and some semblance of a life. What's adding a romantic relationship of sorts to the mix, right? He's got this. ]
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Yeah, trial and error... I'm cool with that. And maybe sometimes we can just come here after we get out crime fighting on. Just to like, crash or whatever.
[ That would be nice, and he'd do it without making Bruce suspicious, because he knows Barry is worried about that. He does feel bad that Barry is going to have to do a lot of the traveling, though. He doesn't want that to start getting annoying. ]
Wish I could just ride my bike to your place.
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[ When distance is regarded as a factor in things, Barry really is the better choice for being the one to do the traveling. Not to say that he'll always be able to drop everything and come running as he does have a life and responsibilities of his own, but. He can find the time to. Always.
Coming to gently play with Jason's fingers, he brings that hand up to his mouth and drops a kiss there. Soft. Sweet. Matching the smile he wears on his lips. ]
Don't worry so much, ok? We'll figure it out.
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[ he laughs softly, cause he's totally just kidding about that (or is he??). he'll have to check up on how quickly he can get to central city though, so barry isn't the only one going back and forth all the time.
the kiss to his hand gets him to slow it down though, as do barry's words. he really is worrying too much about this, isn't it. he lets out soft huff, smile on his lips as he nods. ]
Yeah. Okay, you're right. Shit, I've never had anyone tell me to chill out before.
[ very, very false, but jason's dead sure of it anyway. ]
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That other part, however, has him raise a brow as he cocks his head to the side because... ]
Are you sure about that?
[ He is absolutely calling bullshit on that, Jason, sorry. But at least it's done in both a teasing and playful way? If the smile he wears isn't any indication of that, that is. ]
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Jason rolls his eyes with a laugh, falling back against the bed. What a jerk. ]
Shut up, fine. I get it all the time. But I'm not that wound up, I swear.